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5-Minute housing guide: On the search for a home? This guide will hit all the high points.

Finding a home can be a tough thing. As someone who actually (knows and lives with someone who) owns a home, going back to renting may never be an option.

However, if you are a student, renting is your only option. There are lots of cute apartments and sensible domiciles. Let’s run down the options.

First are the new cottage developments. These are cute little townhomes or chic fl ats smooshed together to create a little neighborhood.

Now these are very safe and sensible, but your friends will never be able to fi nd your home because everything looks the same.

In addition, trying to rent one of these without parental assistance will be taxing. If that is not an issue, then try it out!

Remember to lord your good fortune over everyone else by wondering too loudly why anyone would live in an apartment! That’s half the appeal.

There are also the larger apartment towers and new developments. They’re located on the bus route or within walking distance of campus, and a few roommates mean everyone only has to give up one arm or leg to keep the lights on.

Most of these newer developments have great amenities. Lazy rivers, gyms, drone videos and way too many Facebook ads. It’s new and only took out one block of low cost homes to make!

Next are the older apartment complexes. They tend to be in better shape than you think. Just ask the landlord. Try not to cry when they start yelling at you about maintenance and kids these days.

The best thing about older apartment complexes is the freedom you have. You can totally sneak a pet in there without paying the pet deposit because they’re gonna take your security deposit no matter what.

Honestly, you may as well blow a wall out to maximize the flow of energy. Even if you don’t do a dang thing in the apartment, a single paint chip means that whole deposit is gone. So live a little!

The final option is renting a house. This really is the way to go – you won’t have upstairs neighbors to curse every time they have a Tinder date.

Having a house means you’ll have to compromise. First, you will need roommates. There’s no way around that, so loners need not apply.

If you want to live near campus, you will sacrifi ce several things. One is a sense of security. Every sound will make you clutch whatever pathetic excuse for home protection you came up with tighter and tighter.

The house will probably be kind of ugly too. That should not matter too much, as this is just a rental home.

But seriously, don’t look at the house, you may go blind.  Also, don’t watch HGTV, as it may send you into a jealous rage about countertops and built-ins.

Living in a house near campus means you’ll be looked to for hosting parties. They can be a lot of fun, but remember to not let it get too crazy because no one will help you clean. Remember to hide anything breakable.

Also, be prepared for the old guy who calls himself “Dragon” to drop in, drink your beer and make all the women uncomfortable with his droopy, chest-high gaze and weird cologne that he’s wearing way too much of.

Moving a ways off  campus will fi x a lot of the problems but it will add in transportation. Make sure you load up on podcasts, because you’ll either be stuck in traffi  c or looking at the fl oor of a bus that will probably be late or overcrowded.

No matter where you decide to live, roommate etiquette is important. Confrontation is not ideal but you can’t be passive and do all the chores.

When a roommate stacks half the dishes in the house in their room then tries to pawn them off  on you by bringing them into the kitchen when you’re washing dishes, don’t wash them.

Just stop what you’re doing and fl ing those dishes back at ‘em. Creates a great atmosphere of cooperation and trust, plus it establishes what you will and won’t do.

Make sure to only keep your room clean, and ignore the common spaces. In fact, leave all your drug paraphernalia on the coffee table. That way, you can blame anyone else when the cops come knocking.

At the end of the day, it’s important to be cautious and do your homework when choosing a home.

Make sure you can aff ord it, check if power and water are included in rent, and whatever you do, don’t get a roommate off  of Craigslist. You will see something you can’t unsee.


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